How Motherhood Led Me To Being An Artist.
Being an artist and mother has its challenges. Finding time to have a steady creative practice amidst the chaos of day to day life of raising two babes is probably the biggest obstacle. But the truth is, they are the reason I am pursing my dream of being an artist at all.
Before I was even a mother and had yet to hold my first sweet babe in my arms is when I first returned to painting. It was in this long and hard season of waiting that I found solace and comfort in the creative process. My paints and brushes had been neglected and cast aside for a few years, until one day I had this urge to paint, to create something. And so I did. It lit a fire inside me that had burned out years before, and I began to pursue painting again as I wandered in the wilderness.
Painting was a refuge. It brought me joy and filled my heart with peace. As I reflect back I see how much grace God gave me in the process of painting. I was able to work out my frustration and heartbreak and release the emotions that I so tightly bottled up inside. I was able to reflect on the character of God, to see his goodness, to feel his presence during times when I let go and painted as an act of worship.
Fast forward to life as a new mom, fully devoted to this beautiful little boy that I now spent every part of my day with. He was my biggest blessing. Although I had left my little downtown art studio before his birth, I found myself with a desire stronger-than-ever to paint. I had these chunks of time in-between nursing, changing diapers, tummy time, naps, cuddling, that I found myself drawn to my paints once again. So it was during these in-between moments that my painting practice shifted and evolved into nap-time sessions in the kitchen/studio.
Having my own dedicated studio was a gift that I am thankful for, but I found that being stranded at home while my baby naps is what pushed me to develop a daily creative practice. When I showed up to paint I now was driven and focused because I knew my time was limited. Gone were the days when I could lounge around my studio and dream of the next move I would make on the canvas. I realized what a gift an hour can be to have all to myself, how much painting I could accomplish in an hour if I rushed down the stairs and set up my paints in under 2 minutes.
My babies have allowed me to pursue my dream of being an artist while holding their tiny hands each day. They’ve allowed me to slow down and evaluate my priorities. I am ever thankful for my husband who makes this all possible, and for my sweet, sweet boys who led me to being an artist.
